Happy Glorious Monday, Prosers! I pray you had a wonderful weekend, and hopefully you were able to catch our first show of the new season of Prosey’s Corner this past Saturday. If not, you are in a for a real treat! Nicky and I had the distinct pleasure of promotion-ally conversing with Jeffery L. Miller and Kiland Lee. You can listen to the rebroadcast by clicking on the following link Prosey’s Corner Season 2 Episode 1.
Before I jump into today’s topic, I want to give a brief update on the new release date of my book, my baby, the thorn in my side, just kidding on that last one (well, not really) LOL, The Davenports: A Battle of Wills. As the perfect birthday present to myself and as a way of sharing that very same gift with all of my Prosers and followers, I have committed to an official re-release date of May 17th, 2019. All 2018 Pre-Orders will receive a special edition, signed copy of the book that is long overdue to you and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your patience, understanding and continued support. More details to come as May 17th inches closer. Happy Birthday to Me!
For today’s topic of discussion, I would like to talk about the misuse of the term, narcissist. Most people use this word far too loosely. Pop culture often attaches this label to a wide variety of people who exhibit difficult and offensive personalities. It is important to understand that vanity and selfishness do not necessarily equate to Narcissistic Personality Disorder, which is a distinct set of traits that are a far cry from being simply self-absorbed. True pathological narcissism is a clinical diagnosis, and the residual effects of dealing with a true narcissist can require years of therapy to overcome.
There are many experts who believe in a spectrum for narcissism; apparently it is a trait that a lot of us exhibit to a certain degree. On the healthier side of the spectrum, a person views themselves as unique and asserts themselves with confidence and authority. It becomes problematic when arrogance, grandiosity and entitlement interfere with daily functioning and the ability to maintain relationships.
So what is the true description of a narcissist? A narcissist preys off of the emotions of others and they manipulate other people in order to maintain their framework of self. Individuals with this disorder suffer from a debilitating set of conflicting symptoms that range from extreme dependency to superiority and disdain for others. For anyone who has been in a relationship with a narcissist, they report feeling invisible, unwanted, disregarded and their needs consistently come last; if their needs are considered at all.
It is important to remember that these are not people who have the ability to switch back and forth between a sense of normality and their disorder; it is called a personality disorder for a reason. This is who they are and this who they will always be. I feel it is important to truly distinguish between self-centeredness and narcissism. The recovery from a narcissist is an intense emotional recovery and I would like to provide a few steps to follow on that road to recovery.
- SEPARATION AND REFOCUS– understand the dangers of holding onto emotional attachments and LET GO, LET GOD. Sever all ties to the narcissist/abuser in your life and refocus all your effort back on yourself and your new life.
- REBUILD SELF-CONFIDENCE– reclaim the old you and embrace your personal power, self-love and self-confidence. Use your self-love to turn chaos into peace, and your anxieties into joy.
- BE MINDFUL OF THE PRESENT – teach yourself to be fully present in the moment. Practice calming your mind daily and forcing anxiety to disappear.
- BUILD NEW HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS – form healthy connections and focus on attracting better relationships and nurturing authentic friendships with those who support and treasure you. Obtain tools that will effectively help you deal with triggers and ultimately help you to make better choices in the future.
- FORGIVE YOURSELF!! – always, always remember it is not your fault, it is a lesson learned; albeit a harsh lesson but a lesson nonetheless. Learn from it, grow from it and use it as your testimony to help others.
I hope this helps everyone to better understand what being a narcissist entails and I encourage everyone to apply the term correctly. I am still on the fence about next week’s topic, so let’s just say it is To Be Determined.
Until next time, keep refining, keep shining, keep rising!